Dark Tales
“I had been told that the training procedure with cats was difficult. It’s not. Mine had me trained in two days.” — Bill Dana
I want you near me, but this is ridiculous. Why does my cat poo when I do?
Whenever I go to the bathroom, one of my cats follows me. Dark, my Sepia Ragdoll, walks calmly into the bathroom behind me. Every single time.
Both of my cat’s litter boxes are in the master bathroom. Dark sits down and waits until I am ensconced on the toilet, to see what action I am taking in the bathroom. There is a quizzical look on his face as if he has asked me a question. He is waiting for the answer.
As I start my business, he tilts his head to determine what I am doing, then turns and saunters determinedly to his litter box.
One of the litter boxes is covered, the other is open. Dark prefers the open litter box.
Looking at me, Dark then repeats whatever I am doing in his litter box. As he is doing his business, he has a look that says that this is a job, a very boring job that he must perform. The disdain on his face as we are using the restroom together is amazing.
I know people say that cats don’t have expressions, but trust me, Dark shows me exactly what he is thinking while copying my maneuvers.
After he has scratched and covered whatever, he will climb out of the litter box and walk over to me. He’ll bump my legs. I pick him up and put him on my lap. I keep a towel in the bathroom so we won’t get nookie to skin contact.
He expects a reward for a job well done: lots of belly rubs and head rubs while he tries to lick my arm. He wants to hear what a good boy he is. I tell him.
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The only time that Dark will allow me to put him on my lap is when he has just finished twining my business. The rest of the time, he will lie against me but not on me no matter where we are.
My husband had a Manie Coon, Lone Ranger, that used the john with him except that Ranger did not demand to be petted for his performances.
We have owned several cats, but only these two have ever made it their business to poo and pee when we do. Oh well.
I should get an “A” on my performance review whenever Dark gets around to writing it. I’ve been well-trained.
https://medium.com/no-air/crazy-well-loved-pets-3732b4352544
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